For many, the New Year brings a sense of renewal – a fresh start to prepare for the uncertain future. We find ourselves looking back at the previous year and we think, “This year is going to be the one.” We then create practical and sometimes lofty goals and resolutions that leave us simultaneously feeling confident and anxious about the year to come.
Yet, somewhere between the midnight ball drop and the first sign of spring, the goals that once seemed so promising end up as nothing more than dust-covered magazine cut-outs on a dollar store poster board.
We have all been there, so this is a totally judgment-free zone. What I have experienced personally and in working with clients, is that foundational to achieving any goal begins with developing the right mindset.
Here are four mindset building tips to help you move closer toward achieving your goals in 2020 and beyond.
1) ASK YOURSELF, "Do I really know why I want what I want?" Intention is key. Two people can have the same goal of being wealthy, but person A wants wealth to feel a sense of self-worth and power and person B wants wealth to enrich and empower others. Same goal different intentions that will undoubtedly lead to different opportunities and net different results.
2) AN INTENTION IS NOT A GOAL. An intention is a motivating thought. Understand your Why. Like, really get deep with it. Often times when we go below the surface of what seems like healthy motivation, we find it is actually motivation based in fear; a fear of not being (fill in the blank) or a fear of not having (fill in the blank).
Be aware of your true Why. One way you'll know if your intention was different than what you thought it was is by the intensity of how you feel if your actions don't produce the outcome you expected. As the saying goes, "The road to hell was paved with the best intentions".
3) POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS DO NOT WORK.
Affirmations work by priming the brain with helpful messaging so that new neural connections are formed to create new thought habits which then lead to more aligned actions. The thing is affirmations only work if you:
Believe whatever you're affirming is true.
Consistently affirm the helpful messaging as if it has already happened, every day for at least 40 days.
Do things that support what you are affirming.
Here's an example of a not-so-good affirmation:
If you’re terrible with your finances and you feel like you’re in a dead-end job, affirming, " I am a millionaire" until you are blue in the face will not get you any closer to becoming a millionaire. Why? Because more than likely you spend most of your attention on the growing bills and the job that you despise, so much so that your brain simply won't buy into the idea that you are on your way to becoming a millionaire – there simply are no neural connections hardwired to support that belief.
Instead, your brain will continue to rewire the same thought habits and reinforce the same scarcity mindset that it has been accustomed to. A more realistic affirmation for priming the brain might be:
" I am open to new opportunities and people that bring me closer to being financially debt-free."
Habits are like muscles- you must consistently work them to build them and more importantly, you must believe that what you want to see happen is possible.
4) GRATITUDE AND MEDITATION will not solve your problems or get you to your goals. Yes, I said it. Hear me out first. Expressing and feeling gratitude frequently and practicing some form of meditation or mindfulness technique is paramount to achieving your goals. What is critical to success is inspired ACTION.
We express gratitude (priming for what we want more of) to evoke creative power- the WHAT.
We meditate or routinely quiet our active minds, to gain insight on getting to what we want - the HOW and finally,
We are inspired to ACT through thoughtful intention to achieve our RESULTS.
The key here is to be intentional in all your efforts. Before you begin, be aware of your why.Prime your thinking mind for success and act with purpose and gratitude. This year is your year. You've got this.
Dr. Kanisha Parrish is a transformational life coach, corporate coaching consultant, speaker, and founder of the Mastery Group, a transformational coaching and personal development company.
Using a holistic approach, Dr. K. infuses her psychology and coaching background with mindfulness practice to create transformational shifts in experiences for individuals looking to move from where they are to where they are destined to be.
Connect with her at www.themasterygroup.org